“It meant nothing. Only one evening of enjoyable between two buddies.” The phrases had been hole and tasted bitter on my lips. I turned again to my brother, combating again the tears that wished to fall. “It’s not a factor, Bry. I promise. He broke no bro code or no matter. You’re greatest buddies. Don’t wreck that over nothing.”

“Nothing,” Hawk mentioned just like the phrase gutted him, leaving him empty.

It was solely as a result of Bryce appeared from me to Hawk that I might shut my eyes as my physique shuddered at that phrase. It felt like my coronary heart had simply been shattered.

“BB took benefit of you?” Bryce requested. I didn’t assume he believed the lie, nevertheless it was simpler for him to simply accept it as an alternative of shedding his greatest good friend.

“I barely bear in mind something,” Hawk mentioned, his voice low and impassive. His eyes had gone chilly, and I curled my fingers inward to cease myself from reaching out to him. To the touch him. To appease him. To like him.

“Fucking hell,” Bryce wheezed, sitting within the spare chair. He braced his arms on his knees and tugged on the ends of his hair as he took a deep breath. I took an opportunity to look at Hawk. However he wouldn’t take a look at me. Bryce lastly appeared up, grimacing as he took in Hawk’s cheek, which was now swelling.

“Shit. I’m sorry, man. I’ve barely slept, and once I couldn’t attain both of you, I bought nervous. It’s been hell coping with the parentals, after which I found fucking Olson bought traded to the Blue Devils. He’s taking my outdated spot.”

It was then I spotted I’d gone nearly a complete day with out baseball being the middle of dialog.

“Fuck, man. What was your dad pondering?” Hawk requested, shifting additional away from me as he talked to his greatest good friend.

Bryce sighed, slumping again into the chair, trying totally defeated. He ping-ponged backwards and forwards between us earlier than he spoke once more.

“I nonetheless don’t like this, however I suppose I can take care of it for those who each promise it’s nothing extra. I don’t assume I might deal with that. I simply… I by no means need to have to decide on between you two. I want you each in my life.” He shook his head, his eyes wild.

“Promise,” I mentioned, the phrases killing me and including to the guilt as I spotted how a lot I’d positioned on him.

“Sorry for the…” He motioned to Hawk’s face.

“Don’t even fear about it, man. I deserved it.” Hawk and Bryce grasped forearms in some bro-slap, apparently the gesture for forgiveness in dude-speak.

“Come on. Let’s get one thing for that eye earlier than it swells a lot you possibly can’t see, after which I’m accused of spring coaching sabotage.”

“Like you would damage my recreation,” Hawk scoffed, standing and sliding on his sneakers. He grabbed a shirt from his suitcase and headed to the door, his eyes by no means me.

“We’ll get some breakfast and determine the way to deal with the remainder of this mess, Blanket. Keep put.” Bryce kissed my brow and moved round me, leaving me sitting on the mattress in a numb state of feelings.

“Shit, I forgot my key. Seize the elevator. I’ll be proper there,” I heard Hawk say two seconds earlier than he was in entrance of me, greedy my cheeks and kissing me like I used to be the air he breathed. It was over simply as quick as he grabbed the keycard and jogged to the door.

I sucked in a breath, my coronary heart beating onerous in my chest because the tears fell. Hawk paused midway via the door, his eyes lastly connecting with mine, the emotion there a whirlwind behind his mismatched hues.

I noticed all of the hopes and desires for a future collectively race via them in a matter of seconds, making my coronary heart race and wishing I might take my phrases again.

Then Hawk blinked, and it was gone, changed with a blankness that left me chilled to the bone as he stepped out the door. The latch clicked shut, the sound putting me within the chest as one of the best factor to ever occur to me walked away.

Seems like I bought the cleat retreat in the long run, anyway.

It needed to occur.

I knew that. However it didn’t make it damage any much less.

Neither of us might lose Bryce, and I wouldn’t make my brother select. He’d given me life as soon as, and now… we had been even.

The onerous half was I didn’t know if I might stay with out my coronary heart.

NINE

BLAKE

With damaged sobs, I hurried across the room as I gathered my belongings. I couldn’t be right here after they bought again. I simply couldn’t do it. After all the things that occurred within the final twenty-four hours, I didn’t have it in me to pretend that I used to be okay.

I wanted some house from Hawk. It was too recent, too actual. Now that I knew what it felt like to the touch him, kiss him, and maintain him… it will be torture to carry again.

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