“I’m older than you,” I mumble.

“You would be fifty, and also you’d nonetheless be my boy.”

19

Chasing Ghosts

“We’re almost there!”

“Sure, we’re almost there,” I verify, butterflies going wild in my abdomen.

As nervous as I’m, I nonetheless can’t take the smile off my face, particularly once I flip off from the lane and the headlights illuminate the hulk of a person ready for us on his porch, toes huge aside, arms in his pockets, and that smirk… that smirk that makes me really feel issues I didn’t assume attainable – need issues I didn’t know I needed.

I didn’t go up with him final weekend after his shock go to. I’d promised to take Adam swimming since I had deserted him together with his mom the day earlier than, and I didn’t need to disappoint my son by cancelling. As a substitute, I watched Trevor drive off on his personal, early Sunday morning whereas the visitors was nonetheless gradual.

I hadn’t deliberate on bringing my son on my first official date with Trevor, however when Adam sussed out that I used to be going up, he cried and threw a tantrum till I agreed he may be a part of me to see his Rosie after college on Friday.

He’s out of the automobile like a rocket as soon as I unbuckle him, and straight into Trevor’s arms. I take a second watching, savouring the sight of the 2 of them. Then these eyes land on me and I swallow. I don’t know easy methods to behave. What’s the right decorum? With my girlfriends, I used to be by no means doubtful – I gave them what I knew they wanted: unreserved and unconditional devotion. However I’m not in cost right here, I’m in uncharted territory. Do I play it cool and do a head nod, or does Trevor anticipate extra? What if he expects a kiss. I’m not prepared to try this in entrance of my son.

He should sense what’s happening within me, because the nook of his mouth lifts.

“Come right here, metropolis boy. You’re not too shy for a hug, are you?” His low timbre sends a shiver from my chest down low in my tummy.

“Dad loves hugs!” Adam states enthusiastically, letting go of Trevor with one hand, widening his embrace to let me be a part of them.

Adam’s skinny arm locks round my neck as Trevor’s sturdy arm pulls me in.

“You odor good,” he whispers. His smooth beard brushes my cheek and his hand on my hip squeezes ever so gently, possessively.

Oh, be nonetheless my loopy coronary heart.

“Is Rosie on subject?”

Belief Adam’s love for a cow to interrupt the most effective double hug of my life.

“She’s within the barn, able to be milked for the night. Do you assume you could possibly give me a hand?”

“Sure.” Adam nods. “And I’ve eaten all my greens, virtually on a regular basis, so I’ve grown tall.” Then he gasps, his eyes huge in horror. “Dad, have I’ve grown a lot that the farmer’s swimsuit received’t match me anymore?”

I attempt to not snigger, each at his blatant lie about consuming his greens and his false impression of how a lot he’s grown. “I believe you’ll be effective, son.”

* * *

“The tip.”

“Are you able to learn one other one?” Adam is clutching Moo in a single arm and Wallie within the different, his eyes barely open.

“Let’s reserve it for tomorrow, yeah?” He tries to argue however is just too drained to place up a correct struggle. I kiss his brow. “Love you, Adam. Sleep tight.”

“Love you, Dad.”

“Good evening, Adam,” Trevor says from the doorway.

“Love you, Trev’r.”

Trevor’s jaw goes slack, and his tone is hoarse. “Love you too, Adam.”

He laughs quietly as I shut the door. “I didn’t anticipate a love declaration this early.”

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