Mason frowned. “I can’t inform when you’re upset or not.”
“In fact I’m not upset,” she hurried to say, inserting a chilled hand within the heart of his chest. “I’m simply…wow, do you actually imply it?”
In reply, he rolled onto his facet and opened his nightstand drawer. Pushing a neat stack of books and the case for his glasses apart, he picked up a skinny, rectangular field, then sat up towards the headboard.
“Possibly this may persuade you ways critical I’m,” he mentioned softly, opening the field and holding it out for her. “I ordered this whereas we have been in New Mexico.”
Inside, a gold collar sat nestled towards the black velvet lining—5 skinny chains connected to a big golden O ring. The chains have been the right size for the ring to relaxation securely towards the bottom of her throat.
Addison stopped respiration once more.
“It was our second evening there. I couldn’t sleep, and it took me till virtually daybreak to determine why.”
Working a single fingertip alongside the size of 1 gleaming chain, she whispered, “What was the rationale?”
“As a result of I’d fallen in love with you. I’d by no means been in love earlier than, and I had no concept what I ought to really feel or what ought to come subsequent.” Eradicating the collar from the field, he undid the clasp and held it up, suspended between each palms. “It wasn’t till I ordered this that I lastly fell asleep.”
Addison looped a finger by way of the ring on her leather-based collar, nonetheless buckled round her neck. “Is that”—she nodded towards the gold collar—“like Olivia’s?”
“Do you imply, would I would like you to put on it on a regular basis, not simply after we’re right here?”
When she tried to reply, no phrases got here out, so she nodded as an alternative.
“I would really like that,” he admitted, his voice softer than meant. “Very a lot. That’s one thing we have to resolve collectively, although. If that’s not one thing you need but, and even ever, I’ll perceive.”
She held out her hand, and he draped the brand new collar over her palm, letting the ends dangle off the edges. “It’s lighter than I anticipated,” she mentioned, nonetheless whispering. “It’s so lovely, Mason.”
“As unimaginable as you look in leather-based, the gold can be gorgeous on you. It’ll convey out the gold in your hair, and the flecks in your eyes.” Wrapping a hand gently round her throat, he pressed simply laborious sufficient to make her breath catch. “It fits you higher. You deserve one thing as stylish and delightful as you’re.”
Addison drew briefly, sharp breaths as his hand tightened, however didn’t even attempt to draw back.
“Inform me what you’re considering,” he mentioned, not fairly a command, however along with his hand partially reducing off her air, not precisely a request both.
“I’m remembering how shocked I used to be when Olivia advised me her collar is everlasting.” Her voice got here out as a tasty rasp. “That solely Aiden is aware of the place the secret is. I couldn’t think about wanting that. Being courageous sufficient to let individuals choose me.”
Each little bit of lust and pleasure left him instantly. “Oh,” he mentioned, letting his hand fall to his lap. “I—I didn’t understand. I can?—”
He began to succeed in for the golden collar, not wanting to have a look at it anymore, determined to get it out of his sight. However her hand fisted round it.
Mason stared at her hand for a number of seconds, uncomprehending. Then he dragged his gaze as much as meet hers.
“I was afraid of what individuals considered me. Afraid that if I allow them to in all the best way—in the event that they noticed the actual me, with the issues and the fucked-up childhood and the fears and the kink and all of the tough, jagged items—they wouldn’t need something to do with me. So I filed myself down as clean as I might, and pretended that’s all there was to me. And you already know what? It fucking sucked.”
Her lips lifted right into a jagged, crooked smile, and he felt the heavy risk of tears on the backs of his eyes. “I do know it did,” he mentioned, inserting his hand over her fist. “You don’t have to do this anymore.”
“I’m not going to.” It was a declaration. “I refuse. Did I let you know I referred to as Kate on Thursday?”
“Your buddy in New York?”
She nodded. “I advised her every little thing. All of the secrets and techniques I’ve been maintaining as a result of I couldn’t stand the considered dropping her.”
“Let me guess,” Mason mentioned with half a smile. “She thinks you’re each bit as great as I do.”
Her giggle made the room appear brighter one way or the other. “One thing like that. I’m going to inform Lola subsequent. I’m completed pretending.”
Mason leaned ahead, urgent his lips softly towards hers. “I’m happy with you, toddler. That was an extremely courageous factor to do.”
“I need to put on your collar, Mason. I would like everybody to know I’m yours.” Her hand shook as she unfurled her fingers and held out the gold chains. With a slight tremor in her voice, she added, “I don’t ever need to really feel like I’m alone once more, even for a second.”
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