“Arms by your sides. Don’t transfer. Perceive?”

I nodded, however Ray wasn’t having any of it.

“You’re not allowed to go silent on me immediately, toddler. You and I are about to have a dialog. I’ll ask you once more. Do you perceive?”

“Sure, Grasp.”

“Good.”

I used to be terrified, however I had no alternative however to let the tears run down my face and look forward to no matter was coming subsequent. Ray started strolling slowly across the desk. My pulse quickened when he went out of sight.

“You’re going to get eighteen strikes of the cane immediately. You received’t know once they’re coming. It doesn’t matter for those who scream. Are you going to simply accept your punishment?”

“Sure, Grasp.”

It was fast – too fast for me to organize mentally or bodily. I barely heard the cane transfer by way of the air earlier than I felt the contact and the burning sensation spreading by way of the flesh of my behind. I cried out and my fingers curled reflexively into fists. I screwed my eyes shut. The tip of the cane was already working alongside the naked pores and skin of my leg. Steadying my respiratory took all my focus.

“What are you being punished for, Callie?”

“For leaving you.”

“And?”

“And for being with another person.”

The second strike landed.

“Why did you select to be with him as a substitute of me?” It was already sufficient of a psychological problem to endure the ache with out begging him to cease; now he wished me to additionally hold it collectively sufficient to reply his questions in between strikes?

“I used to be ashamed of the best way we had been dwelling,” I whispered. “I assumed I needed to be… Everybody mentioned I wanted one thing extra… extra wise.”

This time I bought two strikes in fast succession. I may really feel the precise location of every one nonetheless burning on my pores and skin.

“What attracted you to him?” This was harmful territory. Absolutely, he didn’t need me to reply that? I’d been ready for bodily ache; I hadn’t identified he’d be testing me psychologically too. I remembered his promise to me at the beginning: “you will note me get indignant, however you received’t see me lose management”. Something I mentioned would positively make him indignant, however to date, he had stayed in management – the strikes had been effectively aimed, all the identical depth… I’d wished the punishment to occur so he may do away with his anger – if I didn’t inform the reality, if I didn’t set off the deepest elements of his rage, then that anger wasn’t going wherever.

“I discovered him attention-grabbing. I… felt grateful that he helped me get into uni. He made me really feel enthusiastic about regular issues. I assumed… he’d be capable to deal with me.”

“Higher than I may?”

“Sure.”

One other strike. Immediately, my complete physique tensed up. The ache of every strike was constructing on people who had come earlier than – and I used to be solely on the fifth.

“And did he?”

How was I going to make it to eighteen? I compelled my muscle mass to melt in preparation for the following hit.

“Don’t hold me ready otherwise you’ll earn your self an additional strike.”

“No,” I stammered. “He… Typically…” I hadn’t anticipated a strike mid-sentence and cried out in shock. It was working; Ray was indignant. “He confirmed me I could possibly be extra unbiased. However… he additionally made me really feel extra ashamed of who I used to be.”

“Did you like him?”

I’d promised Ray the reality. “Sure.”

Seventh strike.

“Do you continue to love him?”

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