Rays of sunshine shimmered, bedazzling the coral in shiny blues and greens, blended with the sandy backside of the ocean. It jogged my memory of the time I knelt on scorching sizzling planks, overlooking the water, watching Knight as he scoured the sandy backside of the ocean, searching for the right shell.

The reminiscence threatened to burst via my thoughts, like air bubbles rising to the floor.

As a substitute of letting it go, I pocketed it, pushing it down and holding it shut.

It was higher for me to really feel my feelings. I knew that, now.

I used to be lastly getting used to letting them out–to not see my disappointment or anger as weak point. However, somewhat, a manner for my physique to speak my must me.

Feeling an emotion was my mind’s manner of exhibiting me that my coronary heart wanted care, similar to being in ache meant my physique wanted consideration.

And, similar to I wanted to eat and drink usually to offer my physique vitality, I wanted to do issues to offer my coronary heart the love and care it wanted.

And I used to be getting higher.

It had been six months of remedy.

Attempting totally different medicines till I discovered the precise one.

Maintaining routines of train and work.

And, when the nights bought too lonely, I used one thing to assist me go to sleep.

I used to be okay accepting that I wanted assist generally.

Nevertheless, there have been nonetheless some issues that have been too painful to let go–memories like phantoms, flickering into my thoughts with out warning.

Someday I’d have the braveness to allow them to go, however not immediately.

And that was okay.

As a substitute, I blinked, specializing in the coral beneath. Pumping my ft, I pushed down and thru the water, swimming via the fantastic thing about the ocean, cautious to be careful for eels.

A shadow handed overhead, blocking the solar, and I glanced in direction of it, then jolted on the sight earlier than me.

Immediately, I could not breathe.

Unimaginable.

Ready till I used to be utterly out of breath, I steered upwards, kicking laborious till I broke the floor. Sucking in a deep breath, I seemed round, unable to belief myself.

Knight’s ghost haunted me all over the place I went, however by no means had it seemed so actual because it had simply then. I studied the empty bay, catching my breath, making an attempt to disregard the twisting in my stomach.

After which, there was a motion that caught my consideration, after which my breath, as a result of the time had lastly come.

I used to be having a breakdown.

I might utterly misplaced it and wanted to be checked into an establishment, as a result of I used to be hallucinating that Knight was right here in Costa Rica.

I blinked and he was even nearer.

Panic slammed via me. He was truly right here.

On the sight of his decided look peeking out over the water, the copper gleam of his hair, the hearth in his eyes, swimming in direction of me–

I ran, just like the coward that I used to be.

I dove again underwater, pushing beneath the waves, and swam in direction of shore. When it bought too shallow to swim, I ripped off my flippers.

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