“What do you suppose?” Sienna requested, her pulse swishing, drowning out her personal voice.

“It doesn’t matter what I believe. But when I used to be in your footwear, figuring out what I do know…” Natalie’s voice trailed off. “I really don’t know.” She slid her hand via her hair as she rested her elbow on the again of the loveseat, propping her head up. “I by no means actually considered the best way my life unfolded. On one hand, I might say that if I hadn’t stayed within the closet, if I’d carried out one thing else with my life, that perhaps I might have been happier, however I by no means would have met Amelia. Our paths by no means would have crossed. Possibly, I might have been proud of another person. I’ll by no means know.”

“Do you have got any regrets?” Sienna requested softly.

“I’m glad that I obtained an opportunity to document three albums and tour the world. I can’t remorse a second of that point in my life. However I suppose, wanting again now… I ought to have fought for Amelia.” Natalie visibly swallowed. “I by no means challenged her. I simply let her inform anybody who would pay attention that she was proud of Mason and that nothing had ever occurred between us. I believe I ought to have met her. Had her say that to my face.” She blew out a breath. “There have been a number of years spent dwelling on that… On how simply she’d tossed me apart. I might have at the very least preferred her to acknowledge what we had. Even when it didn’t change the end result.”

Any little bit of jealousy that Sienna may need felt listening to Natalie discuss her ex was overpowered by the will to guard her, to in some way preserve her from feeling like that once more.

“It’s her loss,” Sienna stated, the phrases out of her mouth earlier than she realized that she was talking somewhat than considering.

Natalie raked her hand via her hair earlier than she shook her head, a wry smile on her lips. “It was a very long time in the past. And searching again on it now, I don’t understand how I ever might have thought that it may need gone one other method. These two, Amelia and Mason… They have been, and nonetheless are in some methods, the poster couple for nation music and residing a contented, healthful life. It was madness to suppose that she would have left all that for me, particularly again then, when she was solely twenty-one. She would’ve needed to have given up a lot to be with me.” Natalie regarded away. “I can’t blame her for making that call.”

Sienna’s throat was tight. She needed to inform Natalie that she would, that she’d quit her probability at a profession to be along with her, however it could have been too excessive. Sienna didn’t even suppose Natalie had any curiosity in her, past music, however she nonetheless needed to say it.

Natalie spoke as an alternative. “That final music you sang tonight…”

Sienna’s pulse tripped. “By Likelihood?”

Natalie nodded. “You wrote that lately?”

Sienna couldn’t learn Natalie’s expression. These caramel-brown eyes searched Sienna’s face. “I’ve been writing much more these days.”

“Me too.”

Sienna might see the questioning look on Natalie’s face. She needed to ask Sienna, however perhaps she was too afraid to. “I do know it’s a bit dramatic, however it’s how I’ve felt this final month,” Sienna admitted. “I don’t know the way it occurred. The way you have been strolling by simply on the proper time or that I selected that music at that second. By Likelihood was most likely the simplest music I’ve ever written. It simply flowed out of me.”

Natalie regarded away, a touch of a smile on her lips, and when her eyes returned to Sienna’s, they have been misty. “If you have been singing that music tonight, that was all I used to be occupied with. How loopy that day was. About how fortunate I used to be to have been strolling by on the proper time. To have caught that acquainted melody floating via the air, that I wasn’t on the telephone on the time or distracted by one thing else occurring round me.”

Sienna’s breath caught as she listened to Natalie, her coronary heart hammering in her chest as she tried to not learn an excessive amount of into this. There was each probability that Natalie would by no means see her as something greater than a buddy, a struggling artist she might assist.

“It’s a gorgeous music,” Natalie stated with a touch of reverence in her voice. “And it must be recorded.”

Sienna reached for her beer, every kind of feelings operating via her. She needed to inform Natalie extra, about how she might really feel herself falling for her, however she saved it to herself, accepting Natalie’s praise. “Do you continue to suppose we should always? Go to your buddy’s studio I imply. , if he has time.”

“Yeah. Why wouldn’t we?” Natalie requested, her eyebrows furrowed.

“As a result of you realize that I’m homosexual now.”

Natalie closed her eyes for a second as she shook her head gently. “That’s not a priority proper now. It’s best to have these songs professionally recorded. What occurs after that? I don’t know. However you might be so fucking gifted, Sienna. It’s a must to at the very least strive.”

Sienna blinked. She didn’t suppose she’d heard Natalie curse up till now. She didn’t care. She swore extra typically than she’d prefer to herself, however it was the time she’d chosento swear. Did she have that a lot perception in Sienna?

11

Natalie completed her beer as Sienna got here again with a pile of sheets and plaid pajamas folded on high.

“I’m simply leaving these right here,” Sienna stated, putting them on the sting of the espresso desk. “I’m not making an attempt to name it an evening or something.”

“Thanks,” Natalie stated, wanting up at Sienna.

“Would you like one other beer or are you drained?”

Natalie pushed herself up off the loveseat. “Thanks for these. I’m simply going to make use of the toilet, however yeah, I’ll have one other in case you are.”

On the brief stroll to the toilet, Natalie found she’d crossed the road from tipsy to drunk. She nonetheless felt in management, however the results of the beers she’d been ingesting all night have been catching up along with her. This subsequent one would positively be the final.

On her method out, she paused in entrance of the mirror, tousling her hair. It would simply be time to begin placing herself on the market once more. Tonight had been enjoyable. She ought to most likely discover the closest homosexual bar and make it level to go as soon as every week.

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