***

Sunday is over too quickly. Pax has her final week of lessons earlier than Christmas break, and I’ve yet one more day earlier than I’m going meet my destiny within the ring.

Holy shit, what the fuck shall I do?

I can’t let myself be killed. I’ve to make it out of the combat alive, discover a strategy to pay again the money owed, and be with Pax. However how?

I sit on my sofa, my head in my arms, recalling the dialog I had with Elliot and Oliver after they beat the shit out of me. Them telling me they waited all this time, skulking within the shadows, biding their time, till the Crusher got here again to Chicago to combat. He was touring, then he was out sick. Now he’s again and I’m imagined to combat him. It’s all arrange with the boss of the Hellfire Fighters Membership.

As a result of Elliot and Markus had been cousins, and despite the fact that they weren’t shut—which can be why Elliot by no means cared to pay for Kyle’s bills after Markus died—for him it’s rattling private.

And I’m fucked. They know I’m not prepared. Haven’t educated for it in two years. That’s precisely what they’re relying on.

They need me to lose. Even worse, they need me to by no means rise up from the ground of that ring ever once more. Reenacting Markus’s loss of life. Taking their revenge on me.

I imply, that is the Crusher we’re speaking about. The one who put me within the hospital earlier than killing Markus. If I couldn’t take him on then, after I was in prime type, how the fuck can I take him on now?

Yeah, they know all this.

What they don’t know is that I’m not the identical man I used to be then. These two years that handed have modified me. Markus’s loss of life modified me.

Pax modified me.

Again then I fought for cash and a fleeting sense of household and delight and a twisted type of honor.

Now I’ve actual objectives. Actual causes.

Kyle and his mother rely upon me. Dexter and Batman rely upon me.

And Pax loves me. So I’ll rattling nicely rise up from that blood-spattered flooring and do my finest to dwell.

***

The company doesn’t know concerning the upcoming combat. Fortunately oblivious, Johnson has booked me an appointment for tonight. I’ll be spending what might be my final night time on earth with a lady I don’t know as an alternative of with Pax.

Pax who stated she understands, and that she is going to meet Corey for a film.

Dammit, I’m the one who ought to be sitting on her mattress, my arm round her, her head on my shoulder, as an alternative of banging one other lady.

How can Pax stand it? I can barely stand the considered her and Corey, and he’s homosexual, for fuck’s sake.

My dangerous temper haunts me like a darkish cloud over my head as I make my strategy to the rundown lodge I used to be given the deal with to and wait on the reception desk for my consumer to reach.

I don’t wanna be right here. I don’t wanna fucking do that.

Holy fucking shit, I can’t. I really feel like I’m dishonest on Pax. Dishonest on myself and what I really need.

Goddammit.

The receptionist watches me impassively as I begin pacing up and down the lodge foyer, muttering to myself. He’s in all probability seen his justifiable share of madness right here.

Fuck this. I don’t care. My life might or might not finish tomorrow, and I have to spend tonight with my lady.

The receptionist doesn’t even blink after I march as much as the desk and inform him the identify of my consumer and to let her know when she arrives that sadly I used to be referred to as away on a household emergency.

I actually am sorry for standing her up like this, however that’s the least of my worries as I hurry outdoors. I’ve left my bike at house as a result of the clutch was giving me some hassle, so I look ahead to a cab to cross. Fuck, I want I’d downloaded the taxi app Gale retains speaking about. Having my bike I hardly ever must take one.

As I wait, shifting from foot to foot, rubbing my frozen arms collectively, my telephone begins to ring. Once I pull it out of my pocket, Pax’s identify flashes on the display and a smile spreads over my face.

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