We watch Peter Pan, adopted by To All of the Boys I’ve Beloved Earlier than, as a result of one, I all the time get my manner, and two, I do know Puck secretly likes it. It’s nearly 4 within the morning when each movies are completed.

My head is on Puck’s chest, and his shirt has lifted on the backside, displaying off the sting of his tanned abdomen, and my fingers mindlessly tickle the pores and skin simply above his joggers.

It’s solely occurred a few occasions, each occasions ignored by both of us. I’ve been too shy to carry it up, and I assume Puck by no means wished to. However this time, there’s no ignoring it.

Keep in mind once I mentioned he’s grown in additional methods than one?

The rising bulge in Puck’s gray joggers is clear as my fingers hint the waistband.

I’m not naïve. I’ve had extra chats with Maria, a lot to my embarrassment, about protected intercourse and all that jazz. And I do know we’re not prepared but. I’m nonetheless fifteen, in any case.

However the feeling between my thighs after we kiss isn’t coincidental. The curiosity of his rising bulge underneath his joggers from my fingers isn’t an accident.

I’m discovering the best way my physique reacts to issues, and it’s all very complicated.

“Bon,” Puck says softly, and I pause my fingers immediately, too embarrassed to lookup at him.

Puck is seventeen, and he’s curious, far more than I’m. I do know he’ll contact himself when he will get turned on, like I do typically in the dead of night.

It’s a tough idea to make sense of in my thoughts, and with none girlfriends to ask, I really feel slightly misplaced.

There’s solely a lot I can speak about with Maria.

“Hey,” Puck says once more, lifting my chin up along with his fingers so my eyes meet his.

“In the future.” He reaches all the way down to kiss my lips.

“I’m sorry,” I whisper, pink tinting my cheeks.

“Don’t make an apology. Don’t ever apologise. God, Bonnie, there’s nothing I’d need greater than to discover these emotions with you, and we’ll, quickly. Simply not proper now. We’re doing this correctly, okay? I’m not doing something to mess this up. You’re nonetheless solely fifteen, and if my mum has taught me something, it’s to do issues proper. We each have to be sure you’re prepared, okay?”

I nod, slightly embarrassed and likewise aggravated that we’re two years aside in age and life.

“Hey, we have now on a regular basis on the planet, keep in mind? Until Neverland.”

“Until Neverland,” I reply, kissing him once more deeply, till I finally go to sleep on his chest.

Age 17

The bulge in my pants continues to be simply as outstanding after we spent extra senseless minutes kissing and lengthy after she fell asleep on me.

Feeling her fingers hint simply above my waistband was torture, and though I did every part in my willpower to keep away from it, I couldn’t management my physique any greater than my thoughts.

I can’t deny it isn’t arduous each single day, simply taking a look at her, that I wish to do greater than kiss her. However I’m additionally not going to strain, push, or take this additional.

Like I mentioned, we have now a great deal of time.

She’s nonetheless so younger that till she will be able to confidently say it’s one thing she needs, I gained’t go there along with her. I don’t need her to resent me.

So as an alternative, I’ll do what I’ve been doing for the previous few years. As soon as I’m within the bathe, I can handle myself.

Bonnie is inclined to simply barging by my bed room door at any time when she pleases, if she is aware of she gained’t get caught by Carlo, so I strive to not do it once I’m in mattress.

I do not need Bon to stroll in on me.

Carlo’s menace has additionally been sitting at the back of my thoughts because it left his mouth.

Would he actually use her like that? Promote her off to somebody, use her as a pawn, take away her innocence, her life?

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