“Thanks,” I say, angling my physique so I’m going through her, certainly one of my legs bent and resting on the bench, proper up towards her facet. I begin to transfer it, however then she appears up at me once more, and I can’t consider something I would like greater than to be near her. However proper now isn’t about that. Proper now’s about checking on her. Being her pal. “How are you doing in the present day?”

Lucy purses her lips collectively and holds the mug between her arms. “At the moment was…” Her gaze finds the sky. For some cause, the sunshine above us appears to succeed in farther tonight, prefer it’s happening ceaselessly previous the horizon. Possibly that’s the factor about considering dying and mortality and loss all day lengthy. The expanse between this world and the following—the veil—doesn’t appear fairly as thick as regular.

Lastly, Lucy finds her phrases. “At the moment was loads of issues. It was good to be with my household. That’s all the time good. My uncle is kooky however a superb man, and I really like him. His goodness jogs my memory of Daddy—the little I keep in mind about him, anyway.” She takes a sip of the cocoa, hums because it flows down her throat. “I used to be so younger after I misplaced him, that typically I’m wondering if I’m remembering him proper in any respect. Or if I’m actually simply making a model of him in my thoughts, you recognize? A model the place he’s all good, nothing unhealthy, nothing annoying. I’m positive he wasn’t excellent, and but, I don’t keep in mind a single unhealthy factor about him.”

I’m silent, sipping alone sizzling chocolate. As a result of in some methods, I want my expertise was like hers.

She appears over at me. “What are you considering over there, Flake?” Her nickname teases me, wrapping round my coronary heart and squeezing.

I can’t inform her. Can I? However she knew my dad. Knew the type of man he was. A great man, when all of it boiled all the way down to it. One who would by no means have cheated on my mother or his taxes. One who supported his household with integrity, who helped out locally, who regardless of his faults, did love us.

And but, typically all I can take into consideration is the unhealthy.

What does that say about me?

“I’m extra concerned about what you’re saying than in what I’m considering.”

“In order that’s how that is gonna go, hmm?” She simply shakes her head at me, her finger tapping the porcelain floor of her mug. “Hardly appears honest. And right here I assumed we’d lastly agreed to be buddies.”

Ugh, she’s proper. It doesn’t matter what else Lucy is to me, I do wish to depart Hallmark Seaside with us being buddies a minimum of. And buddies share—even when what’s inside is ugly.

I sigh and power my gaze away from her. Up towards the sky, the place I squint and stare on the patterns within the stars. Once I see what I’m trying to find, I lean towards Lucy. “Hey, look. You see? That’s Ursa Main. The Nice Bear.”

“Actually? I’ve by no means actually seen a constellation earlier than.” Her hair brushes my shoulder as she tries to observe my line of sight. “Hmm. I’m unsure I’m seeing it.”

I angle my physique down a bit so I’m proper up towards her, can see issues from her perspective. My finger traces the celebrities within the sky. “See it now?” My face turns towards her, and her hair tickles my nostril.

“Possibly.”

I drop my arm so my hand rests on my lap. “That’s okay.”

She sighs and lets her head fall again a bit, and in the case of relaxation towards the sting of my shoulder, neither of us transfer away. We sit that manner, consuming our sizzling chocolate, silently watching the celebrities for some time.

“I didn’t know you had been into astronomy.”

“I’m not likely. It was extra Dad’s factor.” In all probability a manner he was capable of “escape” Hallmark Seaside with out leaving the city limits. To dream of far-off locations he’d forfeited by transferring right here. However I don’t say that. As a substitute, I mirror. “He wished each Mare and I to take up an curiosity in it too, however solely I actually did. I believe…” My fingers tighten across the deal with of my mug. “I believe I used to be determined to attach with him, you recognize?”

“Since you and your mother had cooking.” She says this prefer it’s a truth, like she’s not even asking. As a result of she is aware of. She was there.

“Yeah. And he by no means actually authorised of that?—”

“You don’t assume he preferred that you simply cooked?”

“Oh, I do know he didn’t. He known as it a waste of time.” The reminiscence of it vibrates in my thoughts. “Thought I must be utilizing my time for a enterprise or regulation internship or volunteering on the hospital or doing one thing that might finally put me on the trail to ‘actual success,’ not one thing unstable. Cooking was an excessive amount of like the humanities for him. For most individuals, onerous to eke out a residing.”

“Blake, that’s terrible. I’m sorry.”

I shrug, and her head bobs a bit with the motion. Oops. “You understand he all the time wished me to get into sports activities—not as a result of it could result in a long-term profession, however as a result of it’d get me a scholarship, connections I might use for the large profession he had deliberate for me. That’s the one cause I actually performed soccer, did monitor and baseball. I imply, positive, I loved taking part in, however I used to be all the time itching to get again into the kitchen to experiment some extra.”

“You’re actually good at it. However I did like cheering for you from the soccer stands too.”

The considered that fires up my insides—although not as a lot as occupied with how a lot she enjoys my cooking. “Thanks. Both manner, I’m grateful to your help.” And I do know I shouldn’t, however I attain for her free hand and provides it a pleasant squeeze. However then, I simply…don’t draw back.

Neither does she.

I stare at our arms, an electrical heat pulsing by means of them, and clear my throat. What was I saying? Oh, yeah. “Anyway, as you recognize, he inspired me to go to enterprise college. To get my MBA. And I wished to make him proud greater than something. However I believe additionally…I type of wished to stay it to him. To point out him that I might do one thing I beloved—one thing that he didn’t assume had benefit—and make it wildly profitable.”

“And that’s why you push your self so onerous?”

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